上周，我11岁的女儿50周来第一次回到学校。当我们为她的归来做准备的时候，我们清理了她的背包，背包被及时冻住了：它仍然保存着第一周班级实地考察的剩余部分of March 2020她的防晒霜、帽子、扑克牌和纪念笔都清晰地提醒我们，就在我们进入自己的地窖冬眠之前。
We replaced these relics with the folders还有书she needed to bring back to school. She readjusted the straps, already worn-in to the contours of her shoulders, and after what has surely been the longest shortest time, her backpack was ready to be put to use once again.
我们目前正处于一段时间内，纪念我们所知的世界何时关闭一周年。不管你是按犹太历法算remember Purim上一次我们作为一个团体聚会，或者你是否按世俗日历计算，把3月12日当作大流行前生命的最后一天，这已经是一年了。12个月的Covid-19意味着我们已经忍受了12个月的Zoom schooland camp, of missed birthday parties and weddings, of uncertainty and disorientation, of deep loss and grief. There is a lot of emotion as we approach this anniversary.
我不再用这个词了”unprecedented” a long time ago — it was so often repeated by everyone, everywhere, that it felt trite by April 2020. But it really is the appropriate word to describe the experience of this past year. What’s more, something that is unprecedented has repercussions. We know that our brains are pattern-seeking. As adults, our patterns of behavior have certainly changed sincethe pandemicbegan — for example, many adults’ social circles have shrunk, as we no longer see acquaintances or co-workers, and we focus just on the people with whom we have deeper relationships. And I know many of us are concerned about the patterns developing in children.
I’m the head of school atJewish day school在洛杉矶，最近我参加了一个虚拟的国际学校领导小组。当来自意大利、斯里兰卡和内罗毕的教育工作者发言时，我们发现，无论学生是亲自上学还是通过Zoom上学，我们共同见证的都是团结一致的：我们都看到儿童时期的焦虑在增加。我们看到社会、情感和发展里程碑的倒退。我们看到孩子们和少数同龄人在一起比和一大群人在一起要舒服得多。我们看到孩子们在接近别人时更加谨慎。尤其是对我们年幼的儿童来说，今年的流行病占他们生活的很大一部分，因此也是他们生活经历的一部分。我们的大一点的孩子理解流感大流行的事件和后果的方式，将告知他们成为谁作为成年人，就像抑郁症和抑郁症World War IIdid for our grandparents.
我不mean to paint a picture that’s all gloom and doom — there have been some beautiful consequences of this year as well. In the beforetimes, my husband and I both worked long hours, and having both of us at home to do the bedtime routine was a luxury. Now, however, our weekday evenings are filled with家庭聚餐在无组织的时间里享受彼此的陪伴，一起欢笑，放慢脚步。在学校里，我与家长们进行了大量的交谈，他们对课后活动、生日聚会或周日体育活动给予了宝贵的缓刑感到非常欣慰。我们的社区联合起来了。我们的孩子们（经常）学会了与兄弟姐妹相处，当他们有其他选择的时候，他们不一定享受那么多。
尽管如此，我认为，在我们即将迎来我们所有生活都发生变化的一周年之际，当所有这些新的行为模式开始形成时，我们有意识地进行标记，这是非常重要的。
Marking time is important for all humans to do; it’s one way that we make meaning out of our experiences. But marking time is especially important犹太教. We mark a week, a month, and a year after a person dies. We celebrate holidays based on historical events that happened thousands of years ago. In fact, the Jewish calendar is so full of time specific events that we acknowledge the one month of the year,Heshvan-通常在10月/11月-他们缺席。
至关重要的是，我们也要在大流行的世界里标记时间——在很多方面，我们都觉得时间与我们通常所知道的时间是分离的——来纪念我们生命中的这个重要时代。同样重要的是要提醒自己，这并不都是“模糊的星期四”
But what does it look like to mark time when you are actively in the midst of the thing you are marking? What isour goal? And how do we commemorate this one-year anniversary in a way that gives us — and our children — strength to continue navigating through the ongoing pandemic? We are not in a moment (yet) in which we can say, “That’s behind us; what did we get out of it?”
And yet, we can still reflect on the year, consider what we have learned and lost and gained, and make decisions about how to move forward. Here are some of my suggestions on how to do this:
Remember that this, too, shall pass (really!).While we know that our brains are pattern seeking, it is also true that the neuroplasticity of our brains can shift. I hear so many parents who are worried about how this pandemic is impacting theirchildren’s development. 虽然我们的孩子的成长因为过去一年的事件而发生了变化，但我们需要记住，我们现在的模式并不是我们将永远拥有的模式。
Do something to commemorate the year.You might want to take a Zoom-free day, write a letter to your future self, find a特殊的徒步旅行, or mark the time with silence. Specifically naming the anniversary, and做something to mark it as a specific moment in time is what helps us to make meaning and to categorize this time in our life.
说出帮助你的事情。As a school, we are planning to make time capsules with our students in which they are each sharing one resource that has helped through the last year. You don’t have to make an actual artifact to think about who and what has kept you grounded.
Celebrate what you have accomplished.我们中的许多人都不知道如何通过两周的远程学习。当然，现在，我们已经在一个大房子里住了50多周了Covid world. Remember that accomplishments come in all shapes and sizes (and not just 1,000-piece puzzles and sourdough bread starters). Try to recognize the full range of ways in which you’ve gotten through this time.
为了我们自己和我们的孩子，我们需要时间来充分理解这一章的意义——但这是另一个时代的工作。目前，我们仍处于这一流行病之中，在这一点上，重要的是，我们必须设法纪念这一年unprecedentedtimes.
至于我自己，我承诺要抽出时间吸取今年的一些教训。我意愿对支持我的人民和资源感到感激；悲痛the events I wish I were attending as spring begins to bloom; to ensure I have enough sustenance to continue on the journey; and to feel gratitude for the fact that a certain 11-year-old’s messy backpack will once again be flung through our front door.
标题图像设计利奥扎尔茨曼。原始图片由mikroman6/Getty Images提供。
