Tovah Feldshuh深入了解犹太母亲

托瓦·费尔德舒赫写道，作为犹太人，一切都是关于闲谈、痛苦和罪恶。

But to her, it’s notjustthose three things — it’s so much more. Being Jewish defines her, and it’s simply everything.

“我的犹太教就像一个第三条腿，深入地在我的两条腿之间的地球上。这是一个镇流器。这是一个锚。与数百万其他人，特别是犹太人“亲密化的捷径是一个捷径，”Feldshhh解释道。“我喜欢犹太人。我喜欢犹太人的原因之一，因为我的父亲喜欢犹太人，我爱我的父亲。他喜欢它。我爱它。”

“What it means for me to be Jewish? A man just passedwith Hebrew在他的衬衫背面——这意味着我可以和一个陌生人交谈，”她补充道。

女演员68岁，当她坐在纽约中央公园的长椅上时，谈到k苹果beplayveller。她经常停下来暂停，要向附近的孩子打招呼，请评论她周围的纽约人的事件，或者闯入歌曲。（如果你想要Tovah Feldshuh向你唱歌，下载the audiobookof her forthcoming memoir.)

作为一名职业女演员，她以在舞台和荧屏上的犹太偶像角色而闻名。1975年，她在百老汇扮演了杨紫杉的角色；在戈达阳台,which became the longest-running one-woman play in Broadway history; portrayed fictional Jewish partisan Helena Slomova inHolocaust,the Emmy-winning miniseries (that also starred Meryl Streep); and played Jessica Stein’s mom, Judy, in亲吻杰西卡·斯坦. 最近，费尔德舒出现在一个犹太母亲娜奥米·邦奇的形象中瑞秋·布鲁姆’s musical comedy疯狂的前女友,and politician Deanne Monroe in行尸走肉,the role she is most often recognized for. To list all her credits, we’d be here for hours.

Feldshuh’s new memoir,莉薇尔：妈妈，女儿，还有其他我扮演的角色触及了她的职业生涯,但不波的类型ok you would expect from a legendary actress. It’s a moving and at times laugh-out-loud funny story of mother and daughter. (But yes, there’s some classic Hollywood memoir details: If you’re a theater fan, you will be delighted by the anecdotes ofBarbra Streisand,Broadway auditions, and Tony parties.)

“What hit me, on the heels of the death of my mother at over 103, was: I’d like her to live forever, like any child who loves their mother. And, she was hilarious, caustic, and wise. That caustic, unique, hilarious humor and wisdom should get out into the world,” she says. “I’m hoping thatLilyville,在里面part, hits the river of common human experience. And I certainly trust it will hit the river of commonJewish mother“经验”

不过，费尔德舒和母亲的关系并不总是那么容易。“她没有用言语表达自己的爱。她从来没告诉我她爱我。我想说，这在我的社会化过程中创造了一个小小的黑洞，影响了我的整个生活。她说的很好，只是不是她的事。”。“我觉得很难。所以，我去了剧院。在一部事先知道故事的戏剧里，你会有多孤独？”

She made her Broadway debut in 1973, after graduating from Sarah Lawrence College and studying at the Guthrie Theater in Minneapolis. However, Tovah Feldshuh was, quite literally, not always Tovah Feldshuh. Born Terri Sue Feldshuh, she changed her name after graduation. (A change her mother, who wanted to assimilate, hated.) “I fell in love with aChristian boy迈克尔·费尔奇尔德说，“泰瑞苏根本不适合你。你的另一个名字是什么？托瓦？现在这是个名字！”

Feldshuh reminds me of Shakespeare’s famous line from罗密欧和朱丽叶●名字里有什么？任何一朵玫瑰，都会闻起来很香。”

“Everything’s ina name“她说，”我告诉你为什么。因为人们的生活是关于自己的，而不是你。他们想活在自己的身体里。所以，如果你看到托瓦·费尔德舒赫，你就假定正统的，以色列的，外国的，和一个犹太的小牛。”

她在百老汇的第一个角色是Cyrano，在晚些时候主演的克里斯托弗·普卢默.“He was very kind to me,” she says. “He liked me very, very much. And not just because I was young and pretty, but because I did my work and never let him down. I had one scene with him. I had the first line of my first showon Broadway— I opened the show [singing], ‘橘子，石榴。柠檬水.’” And with that, she hit the ground running 18 months later she landed her breakout role inYentl她认为，部分原因是因为她的名字，她认为自己得到了一个角色。

Her mother did not care forYentl.曾几尔斯，一会儿，她的百合渠道，占据她厚厚的布朗克斯口音，他们根据她看的方式判断她的角色：“恩特尔，schmentl.I rate your parts by how you look: Dolly Levi is a 10,Golda Meir,zero. If you’re pretty, great. If you’re ugly, what do I need to look at this for?”

她详细地说Lilyville,much of Feldshuh’s relationshipwith her motherwas fraught. “My mother did not answer my fondest wish as a child, which was to tell me she loved me.” And here, Feldshuh, who has, until now, been talking a mile a minute, pauses. “It’s interesting, at my wedding, it just hit me. I’ve never said this to anybody. At my wedding, I sang a song that goes, ‘Tell me please. Does anybody love you? Do you have a secret love affair? And one who worries about you? Who is always true, and tender too, and waits for you somewhere? Tell me please, does anybody love you? For by some lucky chance, the answer is no. And you don’t have anyone to love you. Then do you mind if I do? Because I love you so.’我在我和新郎的婚礼上唱了这首歌。但我意识到，为什么我选择了那首抒情诗？为什么那抒情诗让我如此感动？因为我妈妈没有这三个字。”

Feldshuh, now a mother and grandmother, believes in a different methodof parenting，一个更根植于无条件的爱。“我对任何一个养育孩子的人都是最好的建议：把你对孩子的希望放在你的孩子身上。当你把孩子放上床睡觉时，你说，‘我是个幸运的母亲，因为我有一个如此善良，很好的同情心的孩子。’我记得（我女儿）阿曼达曾经说过，‘妈妈，你怎么会这样？我会说，‘和人一起感觉’，我就一直把它放进他们身上。同样，如果你通过固定人、纠正和纠正他们来不断地表达你的爱，真正的信息是他们不够好。他们没在测量。我有很多。这是非常不受欢迎的。”

“You will have to bea great listener作为家长，她想看看孩子的空间里需要什么。”。“而且，在这个世界上，唯一能得到无条件爱的地方是直系亲属。孩子们走出家门，需要有足够的爱心才能进入这个世界。”

在她的角色作为Naomi束疯狂的前女友她扮演了一个不断纠正、强硬的犹太母亲的爱类型——虽然有些人可能认为娜奥米是一个比生活中更大的刻板印象，但费尔德舒可以理解她来自何方。“保护和保护是犹太人的座右铭。“这是一句老话，”他们想杀了我们，失败了，我们吃吧。因此，为了保护孩子，你必须确保孩子走上正确的道路。所以你纠正孩子保护孩子，认为这是你的一个义务去教导。但如此多的修正是如此的不可剥夺。”

“我的工作通常是在一个犹太女人中放置最好的。这不是那样的，“她补充道。“我不得不为一个目的服务，我不判断它 - 一旦我扮演一个角色，我就在。”

Feldshuh says瑞秋·布鲁姆,疯狂的前女友s的共同创造者和明星“聪明如地狱”，并没有“极限感”。她说，“我喜欢在上面工作。这对我来说是我一生努力掌握的技巧，歌唱、舞蹈、表演和可信的技巧，“她喜欢唱歌，甚至喜欢在“碧昂丝”的视频里(真是太高兴了。）Feldshuh甚至想转身Lillyville在电视节目中，虽然她还没有向任何人展示她的演讲文件——她首先想展示布鲁姆，看看这位明星对她有什么“严厉的批评”。

In whatever she does, it seems Feldshuh is portraying strong Jewish women. Her last role, pre-pandemic, was of Supreme Court JusticeRuth Bader Ginsburg在里面Sisters in Law，乔纳森·夏皮罗的一部戏剧。她迫不及待地等待百老汇回来，她相信，“我想积极；我认为纽约文化会爆发。”不久，她接种疫苗后，准备飞往加利福尼亚的一家剧院“创造另一位非凡的犹太女主角”（她没有暗示谁。）

最终，她希望读书的人Lilyvilleleavehopeful.“There is no relationship that cannot be worked out,” she says. “It can be worked out. There’s a saying that a branch, in order to bear fruit, must learn to bend. So, my mother and I bent toward each other.”

通过Gonzalo Marroquin/Contributor的头图像