OK,here we go again.Cell phones.But this time it's texting,not talking,that is pushing my buttons.
Please,don't take this as apersonal criticism nor a judgmenton all moms,遍及一直（我是说你，Tamara.) I am addressing the effects of texting on your kids as I see it.I will,however,point out that I have over 100 years of parenting experience (How old is that lady?you ask.I am referring to the total ages of my children.)
So.
The other day 3-year-old Aaron and I were in our weekly art class together.At the beginning of the semester,the teacher had specifically,and reasonably,要求成年人不要带热咖啡或使用手机。每个人似乎都很满意——10个保姆和两个祖母。I briefly wondered why she felt she had to point out the obvious potential danger of the first and the clear distraction of the second.After all,这是一个专门针对幼儿和他们的护理者的班，他们一起参与。大人们坐在孩子们后面，给他们提供鼓励和指导。
过去的一周，we had two moms with us.大人们帮着用胶带把纸粘好，准备好了供应品，看着孩子们把吸液管和刷子蘸在油漆里做他们的设计，因为我们确保墨水不会溢出，孩子们也会分享。
I looked up.两个母亲were texting furiously.
The "substitute" grandfather next to me waskvelling 为了他的孙女.The nannies were all watching their charges.I had one eye on Aaron and one on the texting mothers.
The teacher saw one miscreant and just looked at her.And looked at her.The mom didn't raise her eyes to the teacher,to the painting,or to her daughter.
And the teacher looked at her.By that time,I had one eye on the teacher and one on the mom.
Finally,the mom looked up.The teacher sadly shook her head and mouthed the words,“把它收起来。”妈妈说了。房间另一个还没被抓住的妈妈也是。
What are these people thinking?There is no way that this is the only time these moms are texting in the presence of their kids.Moms today are,就像以前一样，very,very busy.These two particular moms have new babies at home.Why not make this 1 ½ hours just about you and your older child?Why not let your kid know that,至少这一次，you are all hers and hers alone?What message does texting send to the child during class?I'll tell you.It says,“即使我和你一起上课，and I like coming with you,and I like watching you color,还有更重要的事情我必须做right now.You are not the most important person to me during ‘your time.' The guy at the other end of this text is." If the kid were older,she'd know enough to be insulted.But still I believe she is processing the non-verbal message in a way not conducive to healthy development.也不是为了一个好的母子关系。
In my opinion,each child in a family deserves undivided attention on a regular basis,regardless of one's other commitments and interests.Bedtimeis a good time for that–some snuggly alone time after a book.但如果你已经抽出时间一起上课了，do ittogether.Unless there's an emergency,which can be ruled out by a discrete look at a vibrating cell phone,those phones,在与孩子相处的“特殊”时期，无论是交谈还是发短信都是禁忌。
The phone didn't ring and I didn't have to endure loud conversations as I do with cell phones on the street,the bus,the movies,the classes I take,and the ones I teach.The texting doesn't directly affect me.
But it does affect my world by making one little kid at a time feel diminished.由她自己的母亲。
